It is hard to believe it's been 4 months since I've last visited loveyourflawz. However, I like the distance. Now I have something to truly write about. An actual event will be taking place in my life. For about a year I've been planning and preparing for England and now exactly to the date I have a week to go. My stomach is in knots, my mind races with a million thoughts and once in a while my hands begin to shake. Yes, I am nervous and anxious about my trip and some fear is mixed in too. I am not afraid of what is waiting for me there, wonderful friends, but more less it is the unknown that frightens me. This will be my first trip anyway alone and since this is my first journey outside the States I'm even that much more nervous about it all. It will be worth feeling all of this once my feet touch down on English soil. I am looking forward to sharing of my travels once I return. Take care all.

Lindsey

Ok this morning I've decided that I'm just going to be the real Linds and carry on has I have been when that certain co-worker is around. I hopefully won't fall into the lines of " fakeness" today...is that a real word? Yet still if anyone out there in the big world of the net stumbles upon my little blog and has some insight to share my ears are open!  Anyway here's to all of us having a great day and weekend...CHEERS!

Take care, God bless,

Lindsey

I've always been about being real. Fake people really unnerve me but I find myself asking my inner self "are you being genuine?" I feel I am but yet there is this underlining sense that all of me is not truthful to myself or to others. The situation is this...for three months a certain someone where I work, my co-worker, has been out on leave for reasons only she knows. For those three months I've found that things at work have been moving on smoothly and her presence I really haven't missed. On one hand I can count the people who really make a difference in my work environment. At one time I thought she was one but after her leave it became clear that she truly wasn't and isn't one of those special few. The ones who I truly admire and look up to are hands down, point blank, no hidden agenda people. Those are the ones I want to surround myself with...life shouldn't be about guessing where people stand we should know where they stand. So I find myself unsure of where I stand in the genuine department in regards to where my fellow co-worker is involved. Today she has returned to work after a three month leave and I find myself trying to avoid her. She tends to be one of those people who get caught up on what her outside appearance looks like and not so much the inside. Me I want the inside to be in line first. So my question is how do I stay true to myself in not acting one way toward my co-worker when I know deep down inside that I feel completely different about her. I am sure there are countless many out there who have been in my situation. Some advice I've been given this morning from one of my admired co-workers is to speak but keep on walking...don't slow down to have a chin wag (chat) with her. However the real me is someone who doesn't want to just brush people off...what do I do? Maybe I should just think on it for a while and go with what I feel inside. 

Have a great day,

Lindsey